Wednesday, July 18, 2012

Jesse Tyler: one unlucky lawman

Perhaps some men shouldn't be lawmen.
If yer' unlucky at cards
ya' might lose yer' shirt.
If yer' unlucky at love
yer' feelin's get hurt.
But if ya' put on a badge
an' don't have much luck,
ya' best be quick on the draw
or learn how ta' duck.
Jess Tyler put on a badge
in the state of Utah.
When he first wore the star
he felt rather tall.
He tried ta' be honest,
he tried ta' be true,
he handled his duties
an' lived by the rules.
He sought cattle rustlers,
he'd chase a horse thief,
he'd dump on mean drunks
fer' spreadin' their grief.
He'd punch a loud braggart,
he'd slap a "ho's" tail,
he'd bully a bully
then slap 'um in jail.
But times they did change,
life runs many courses.
He was sued by a horse thief's wife
fer' takin' back the stolen horses.
He would trail Butch Cassidy
an' others of the Wild Bunch.
Even sought the Sundance Kid
after somebody's hunch.
While other lawmen caught the "most wanted"
an' made themslves a name,
the infamous still eluded Jess,
he captured no big game.
He then was bested by some rustlers
in eighteen-ninety an' nine.
He should have seen it comin',
he should have read the signs.
Tyler's luck was a fadin',
at this rate it couldn't last.
He was headin' fer' a casket,
an' it looked like the die was cast.
On May 16th, in nineteen-double-oh,
Tyler led a posse near Thompson, Utah.
They sought Harvey Logan an' his rustlers,
who escaped them up a draw.
They sought them near,
they sought them wide,
they'd catch a glimpse,
then they would hide.
An' the posse soon did grumble,
a few were saddle sore,
but Tyler kept them movin',
more places to explore.
They saw a camp just off a piece,
a welcomed situation.
"There's injuns a campin',
lets go seek information."
They didn't want ta' rile 'um,
an' they didn't want 'um ta' run.
Tyler an' Sam Jenkins dismounted
an' left behind their guns.
Up ta' the camp they sauntered,
they came up unaware
that it was the rustlers camp,
an' in their sites they had 'um square.
Jenkins an' Tyler turned ta' flee,
but Logan aimed an' shot.
The smoke appeared an' cordite burned,
both lawmen laid ta' rot.
Both unarmed,
both shot in the back,
Tyler's luck had run its course.
He probably felt
as he lay dyin'
like the ass end of a horse.
When ya' take upon yer' chest a star
an' ya' hunt down onery men,
you should never leave yer' guns behind,
unless ya' want yer' life ta' end.
Now the posse saw
the two lawmen fall,
an' they spurred each cayuse.
They all fled
with fear an' dread,
an' cryin', "What's the use?"
The lawmen laid upon the ground
with creepy crawlies an' critters around,
two whole days while the cowards started drinkin'.
The courage of the posse
came back when eyes were glossy,
an' they went ta' fetch the corpses --
both of them now stinkin'.

Never leave yer' guns behind, boys.
Never leave yer' guns behind.
And fer' those whose courage
          comes in a bottle --
          you'll only tarnish the stars that shine.

No comments: